I can’t drink coffee anymore..probs not gonna make it.

I can’t drink coffee anymore..probs not gonna make it.

It is now January the 29th, in the year of our Lord 2020. It has been precisely 25 days since I've been able to handle a cup of coffee. I'm obviously dying. I've been sick the whole month of January. The whole freaking month! I had this inner ear thing going on where I was [...]

I deserve some freaking flowers.

I deserve some freaking flowers.

Daughters: A mom's best friend. A soul sister. The child who never leaves you even when they grow old... Yeah, ok, maybe. But they forgot to tell you about the part where they almost kill you before they turn twenty. One particularly monumental little daughter of mine started out in life weighing 6 pounds. The [...]

“Dirty dishes belong in the dishwasher, not the sink!!!” …..says every parent ever.

“Dirty dishes belong in the dishwasher, not the sink!!!” …..says every parent ever.

We have a lot of kids around here. Seven of them ranging in age from ten to nineteen. It gets really stressful having this many people in the house, but not for reasons you might assume. Funnily enough, it's not the kids who stress me out. It's my husband, God bless him. Poor G has [...]

The fire chicken has entered the building.

The fire chicken has entered the building.

It's sports season for the kids. We are in volleyball tournaments every weekend. I used to think I was kind and patient and understanding (for crying out loud I'm pursuing a degree in social work!). This weekend I realized that I can be none of those things. Instead I can be angry and impatient and [...]

I’m not getting mother of the year.

I’m not getting mother of the year.

Today started out as Not A Good Day. You know the kind. You wake up already exhausted to hear one kid, the kid who especially irritates you, shrieking her high pitched shrieks all over the house. Her helpful brother is telling her in an incredibly loud stage whisper to "SHUT UP ALREADY!!!" She is not [...]

Bad Dreams

Bad Dreams

A little known fact about me: If you wake me up at 5am, I am generally a nice person. This is really saying something because if you wake me up at 7am, you're likely to get your head bitten off. My children have learned through painful experience that you do not stand outside my bedroom [...]

Fishbowl

Fishbowl

In which ugly naked guy is real. “Do not judge my story by the chapter you walked in on.” Anonymous I am currently rewatching all the "Friends" episodes from season one all the way through to the end. Call me old and lame but there it is, I love that show! It’s mindless and perfect for [...]